Re-focus

I've been uber negative and irritated lately. I hate it. haha...I'm irritated with being irritated. ok not funny. But anyways, there is a strong possibility that tonight that will end. I have a chance to honestly share my frustrations with a person and this could be a chance for me not to have to keep it bottled up anymore. I don't want to fight...so a lot of my venting will take place in a journal- not online =). Maybe this will help, I don't know. It needs to be done. Because my view of her has been distorted by my frustrations that keep growing and growing the longer I keep them insided and as I process them mentally over and over again. And that's not right, I don't want to have this warped view of things. So I'm gonna speak a little peace, as gently as possible. Besides that...I need to pray. A lot. For a patience and a positive outlook, because currently I get frustrated over the stupidest things. And how am I supposed to be showing God's love to people if my first reaction is to be irritated with what they are doing? Yup, definitely need to work on that.

I'm so ready for Spring Break! I'm gonna party it up in...Oklahoma? Yeah, it's gonna be totally sweet. I get to go through states that I've never been to. And I get to see Nikki. She's rad, and filled in as my roommate last year. So I'm really excited to see her. I miss making lame videos with her. We'll see what we can come up with in the few days I'll be there!

I'm officially ready for this semester to be over. Well, I think I was officially ready in September, but who's counting. I'm like so completely drained. I've been more "studious" this past year than all my other years of college combined. I'm almost done...just a few more papers, one or two tests. But I'm so numb that it hasn't really sunk in yet. Weird, but give it time. I'm not exactly complaining that all this work is going to be over soon.

Today was the birthday of one of the boys in our class at church. Jen and I made cupcakes, which he ate like he was just turning one, even though today was his 4th b-day. I didn't know eating a cupcake could be that messing. Frosting everywhere: all over his face, hands, up his nose. It was cute.















Alright...resume time! Woo hoo!

Blah...sick

My throat hurts. Lame cold...and sore throat. I felt pretty sick this whole weekend. Especially Friday. So I learned not to drink an energy drink at 6:00 in the morning on an empty stomach. Because then I will find myself driving away from Kettlemen City and needing to stop at the next rest stop to vomit, which I didn't do. The vomitting that is. But I did stop.

This weekend was pretty cool. I got to see my family, minus one. My sister cut my hair. I now have bangs again. A little shorter and thicker than I was going for, but that's totally cool cause they grow fast. Nik and my dad get a long...a little too well if you ask me. It's like they feed off of each other and combine their annoying and rather dorkish ways. Totally kidding. I'm glad they get along.

I'm stressed about what's to become of me in six months. Hopefully I'll be working at a job that I love and not one that I just had to settle with. We'll see. But I NEED to get working on my resume so I can at least get a job. That would be nice.

Papers are Lame

Tis true...papers are way lame. However...only a month and a half and then no more papers ever!!!! Or until I go to grad school, but hopefully that won't be for a little while. I need a break from this whole "paper" thing.

This weekend was rad. Jen and I took a last minute trip to her house for the weekend because it was snowing there. I love snow...but it's cold and numbs my fingers. But I guess it's worth it. So Freshman year of college was my first time ever seeing snow in person...and the "snow" we saw was left over, dirty snow on the side of a parking lot. This weekend was my first time seeing fresh snow and it was awesome.

Jen and I also had some amazing discussions. They really made me think. One was on the importance of prayer and I'm convicted that my prayer life isn't what it should be. I don't place on it the importance it deserves. I remember when I was in China with my ISP team. We were in prayer everyday, all through out the day. We lifted up everything to God, every relationship, every conversation. And we saw God work, even in what seemed like impossible situations. Those experiences taught me the importance of relying on God and staying in constant communication with Him. But I seem to have lost sight of all that. I don't trust in Him like I should. Instead I try to rely on myself, but nothing happens and I just end up more stressed out than when I started. So anyways...I'm working on changing that. And it's a good time to start, because I've got a whole lot of stresses that I could sure use guidance with!

Alright....I guess I'll do my paper.

First Serious Post

This is my first serious post on my first serious blog. Yeah...we'll see how long that lasts. So serious thought...uh....well....yeah, I got nothin.

yet.